Laying Down The Precious Things

I lay them down

These precious things

Again

And ride the merry-go-round of pretending or actually believing it’s ok

To leave them lying there, under the blanket of the unknown

I walk away for awhile & angst begins to fade

& sigh in relief & triumph as the weight is lifted

Then the smallest of barbed things taps my shoulder

& wakes me up at wee hours

Fear hissing a hypnotizing melody

And I look back at the precious things

Or down

Or up at them

Depending on where I stand inside myself at the moment

The wondering of the un-happened, the unseen

It doesn’t seem to ever fully leave

It only eases

And for a while I’m lighter than I was

Undeserved gracious grace

Over & over, as needed

Who among us walks with no trials this side of heaven

No one

But in our laying-down we get to walk

In the un-earned Gifts of joy & peace

Which is to really live

Free, in spite of us & all our doubts & shortcomings

In all the little hallelujah moments

That spit in the face of the hissing

Those moments that make all the difference

And keep hope alive

For our precious things.

Much love & laying down y’all,

Bonnie

(courtesy of www.makregadget.it)