I lay them down
These precious things
Again
And ride the merry-go-round of pretending or actually believing it’s ok
To leave them lying there, under the blanket of the unknown
I walk away for awhile & angst begins to fade
& sigh in relief & triumph as the weight is lifted
Then the smallest of barbed things taps my shoulder
& wakes me up at wee hours
Fear hissing a hypnotizing melody
And I look back at the precious things
Or down
Or up at them
Depending on where I stand inside myself at the moment
The wondering of the un-happened, the unseen
It doesn’t seem to ever fully leave
It only eases
And for a while I’m lighter than I was
Undeserved gracious grace
Over & over, as needed
Who among us walks with no trials this side of heaven
No one
But in our laying-down we get to walk
In the un-earned Gifts of joy & peace
Which is to really live
Free, in spite of us & all our doubts & shortcomings
In all the little hallelujah moments
That spit in the face of the hissing
Those moments that make all the difference
And keep hope alive
For our precious things.
Much love & laying down y’all,
Bonnie
(courtesy of www.makregadget.it)
Oh, girl! This is good. Undeserved grace and laying it down keeps us walking…walk on, brave girl.
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Thank you Becky- i am sure trying. ❤️
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